This week: 02.10.16

Last week Husband's maternal grandfather passed away. He'd been sick a while, so it wasn't sudden, but did come faster than we expected. The service was lovely and I wished that I had known him better. My heart ached to see his children and grandchildren mourn. It was a bitter but beautiful thing. There are the logical positives, like that he lived a wonderful and long life, he's now out of pain and he's back with his sweetheart - but losing someone you love hurts.

These are the girls at the funeral - at least they were cute! And let me tell you, having a baby at a funeral is great cause they let you use their blankets to dry your eyes! I was anxious, but all of my children were perfect. Just what we needed as we mourned.

While we're talking about hard things - my friend recently got diagnosed with breast cancer. We're the same age. We have children the same age. She's fighting and I hate that this is part of her life. That's all I want to say about it, it's too hard of a topic. Here's why I tell it: their last name is Lyon and when we pray for them Wade sneaks in a little "rawr" each time. I love it. And it ensures that I never forget to pray for them.

Mr. Wade is sick. Again. This year has been the worst. I haven't been giving him milk, since it makes his cough terrible, which really roughens the wake up routine. Here he's crying as he wakes up because the sun is too bright for his eyes. Don't dis the sun buddy, never dis the sun.

He's still recovering from pneumonia damage a bit, and with this new cold he can't be active at all or he'll have a cough fit and throw up. It's awesome. We started out last weekend with him puking in our bed (and we ended the weekend with Stella puking on my duvet - what is going on?!?!). We've been doing lots of puzzles and coloring and having too much iPad/TV time. Luckily, Wade doesn't seem all that bothered about being sick - he's probably just thrilled at his iPad time.

Blake is also sick, but it doesn't seem to bug her either. Except when I try to wipe her nose because I'm a mean mom. She's wiggling so stinkin' much! I frequently finding her crying in predicaments such as the above. She has a harder time falling asleep, so I've been a hard nose and let her cry for about 10 minutes (which has helped a ton! She's figuring our how to self soothe and it's translated into better naps and nights for her, which equals a happier baby and mama!) - but I always feel guilty when she's crying and I come to find here like this. She can roll from her back to her tummy now! She is just moving all over.

Jacqueline, on the other hand, has zero interest in rolling over. She found her thumb this week. I'm already worried about weaning her off of that! But, she's started sleeping for 10 hours straight because of this little trick - then she'll do a quick feed around 4 am and go back to sleep for another 4 hours. So I'm just worrying about weaning her, not doing anything about it - that thumb is her (and my) little friend. This little girl just came to us so tired.

And I've been working on our room. Here's where I'm at - prior to the puke fest. I haven't put it all back together yet. It's becoming this warm and inviting place that we want to be. There are still a few things I want to do, but it's made some serious strides. 

Oh, and Husband is still working on our car. We're going on over a month with only one car (first world problems!!). I feel like the last few months have been difficult for several reasons and Husband keeps saying I'm a trooper. Well, let it be known that I don't want to be a trooper anymore! Unless it's a Storm Trooper or a State Trooper ...some kind of a trooper with a gun so I can shoot out my stress. 

In other musings, I wish I had a camera always rolling to capture all the moments. I've never been one to say I want my kids to stay little, or they're growing to fast - I love watching them learn, figure out new things, reach milestones and move into new stages. Each new stage has been my favorite. But there are things I don't want to forget. I don't want to forget Jacqueline's cheeks when she smiles - every single time I have to snuggle her in and do a sucky kiss on them because they are so soft and sweet. I don't want to forget Wade's eyes when he's eating - they're so intense, happy, and zoned out all at the same time. I don't want to forget how Blake wiggles all over - her wiry, tiny little body is always moving, even when I nurse her and she's sleeping her arms still move erratically. And there are a hundreds, no, thousands of other things I don't want to forget. I feel like I've been trying to stop and just drink in who my children are at this exact moment. Because tomorrow they'll be just a little different. But tomorrow I'll want to drink them in too and hold onto who they are in that moment.  Witnessing their life is the most paramount reward - is astonishing and wonderful. 

Now to get all unsentimental - I started binge watching Vampire Diaries and that garbage is calling my name. 

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